I meant to post this entry on October 5, 2010, the date that would have been my father's 70th birthday. Somehow, I did not, but here it is:
Ten Things I learned from my Dad
This is a re-write from memory from the original of 2002. This was first written and read at my father’s funeral in August 2002. It is the best recollection I have of the eulogy and posted in honor of my father’s 70th birthday: October 5, 2010. A few things at the end I added for this post exclusively, they were not read at the funeral.
Ten Things I learned from my dad:
1)
Measure Twice, Cut OnceClearly this means you need to take care with your work. A carpenter who measures twice has taken the care to not waste valuable resources. Outside of carpentry this quote means to think before acting, to take pride in work, to slow down and be careful.
2)
Take the Bull by the HornsGot a problem? Only you can solve it, so take the bull by the horns and wrestle that problem to the ground. Sometimes the direct approach is the best approach. Take it head on and don’t let go until you’ve beaten the beast!
3)
No RegretsNo one I know of has a time machine. We’re stuck with the mistakes we make, but we can’t change the past, so we have to let go. Don’t wallow in what could have been, look to the future, forgive yourself and others and move on.
4)
Love FreelyDad got this from his mom. Don’t go around pointing fingers, judging, feeling superior to others. It’s karma, who is to say who is right or wrong, who is worthy or not? Care for your fellow human being. Give and receive. Love freely, and it will come back in abundance.
5)
God Be Willing and the Creek Don’t RiseThis was Dad’s famous disclaimer. It’s like when you are planning for the future and you don’t want to jinx yourself. My father enjoyed healthy future planning and often said this as he projected.
6)
God Can be Worshipped AnywhereI remember this from my childhood. We were sporadic church goers, but the reverend, Mr. Hillis, was a part of our circle of friends. My dad would discuss religion and practice and I remember when he said that he told Mr. Hillis that you didn’t need to be in a church to talk to God. I think my dad even said you could be in the middle of a field.
7)
Don’t do anything Half AssJust do the job right! If you can’t then get some assistance, but by all means, be honest about it. Take pride in what you do and if you are doing something for another, then do it with the best you have to give.
8)
The Pencil Never LiesThis was Dad’s budgeting tip. My dad always kept a budget and discussed it. I learned to manage money from an early age. I now use the same steno pad as my budget book. In fact, like my dad, I love to trace the numbers. As I used to say to him: “Will that make the money grow?”
9)
Drive with the best of themThis one comes from our first memorable vacation to New England in 1977. We were driving the highways near Boston and there was heavy traffic. My mom was in a panic and my dad was all relaxed (likely thrilled) saying: “I drive with the best of them!” What I took from this is to not be intimidated, even when you are out of your element.
10)
You’re just as good as anybody else
I remember being told we were upper middle class! I believed it, and what’s wrong with believing? It was only in college that I learned we were working class. But I grew up never feeling inferior, poor, left out…never. My father fostered a very strong sense of self and power in me, especially as a female. I think the lesson here is that belief is everything.
And two colorful rejoinders:
11)
It was Moving like a Whip-o-will’s ass in a wind stormGood God he’d say that! It was so funny! Of course it simply means it’s going very very fast!
12)
Tell ‘Em where the Bear shits in the BuckwheatTell it like it is! LOL! Perhaps the polite word here is to be pragmatic.
My dad's been on my mind a lot lately. I don't believe in heroes, but he comes really close to one just coz he's an inspiration to how to live life well. :)
